THE END MAYA BE NEAR

So I'm sitting here trying to plan out my limited future and what do I hear? That it all could be for nothing. Thanks to the Mayan calender the world will end in April 2012. No, no don't thank me. Thank the Mayans.
And I'm not talking buy your sneakers and gym suits 'cause the space train is ready to stop and pick us up kind of end. I'm talking about a culture that invented a calender far more accurate then the puny free drug store calender with cute kitty's that we all use kind of end. I'm not talking about an ending caused by our computers not being able to click over from 1999 to 2000 kind of end. I'm talking about a giant black hole that can swallow whole planets pointing right at us kind of ending. I'm talking about an ending that has scientist scratching their heads saying things like: got me! They admit that most likely something will happen they just don't know what.
Of course some may argue that what the Mayans meant was simply the end of one phase of the world and the beginning of the next. I myself think a couple of letters got knocked off and what the Mayans meant was that deep space is setting phasers to full power and they're pointed right at our ass. Let me put it this way: if this were a Star Trek episode planet earth would have a giant red uniform on.
Of course there are some positives. If the world is ending in April 2012 then buy yourself the most expensive Mercedes-Benz on the lot and defer your first payment until May 2012. Sweet deal! Or how about letting yourself gain 50 pounds a year. Then when you reach the point of your most ugliest and most unhealthful life on the big E will be over anyway. Talk about turning lemons into lemonade.
The main thing to remember is that whatever happens has happened before. Evidently the end of one phase and the beginning of the next happens every 25,000 years. It's just no one remembers the last one. Good? Bad? Who can say. For all I know 25,000 years ago some old fat blogger from Atlantis was typing away saying, "what up earth? why you gotta be that way?"

Fat old blogger EZRick singing off from the lost civilization of California. Now get off my sinking rock!